Happiness is a way of mind

"Happy are those who hear the joyful call to worship, for they will walk in the light of your "presence, Lord." Psa 89:15NLT

Joseph is the best gift that lifted up the life of our whole family. My sister and brother-in-law had waited 8 years before Joseph was borned. Our parents are so delighted to have a baby around, especially my dad. To him, Joseph is the best gift because he is able see the growth of a child. When we were young, my father has to work very hard to provide for the whole family, and also my grandmother's family because he is the eldest, and my grandpa passed away early. Being the eldest and most responsible man, he took care of everyone in the family. He sacrificed so much that he missed to see us grown up. Now, he is taking his second chance to see and look after Joseph. From the photo, you can see that Joseph is really a very happy and healthy grown child.

Yesterday, I went for church service, and followed by one couple in my cg who went through water baptism. They've been in church for a year, but the husband is really on fire for God. By faith, he signed up for School of Theology, and had started the course now. I think this is really amazing because i see how he comes to church and how his life got changed through God. I think it is a blessing to have a cell group member like him.
After that, our whole cell group went for another cg member's mother in law wake. we've a total of 3 tables, and i felt that this is the ffirst time that we are so united as a family.

Some thoughts.....

God is a good God, He never allows us to withstand things that we can't handle.
Just a few day ago, i felt that my marriage was on the rock, and despite of my cry for help, God intervened and changed the whole situation around.
Though it is a very hard to take it, but i believe that when God speaks, it is always the right timing and situation.
Praise the Lord, and Hallejuyah! God is a living God! Amen

My Marriage Testimonial

I've been married to Andy for 10 years. On the left, it is the photo taken during our 10 anniversary recently.

Andy is a very wonderful husband, he always gives in to me despite sometimes i am very unreasonable and wilful. He loves me with all his heart though he can't express himself very well. Our marriage is not a bed of roses, gone through a very hard time during the first 2 yrs to adapt to the marriage life, and from the 3rd year onwards, our relationship was not very good due to my long working hours, and part-time degree course. on the 6th year of marriage, divorce began to come to my mind because of lots of conflicts and disagreements. It's also in that year, i came back to our Lord, Jesus Christ. During that period, i suffered minor depression which affected my life and my job. but, God is a good God. Despite of all that i was going through, He brought a lot of cell group friends into my life, and i got a lot of support from the cell group members. Andy began to see the joy in me, and started to follow me to church, and in end 2003, he received Christ as his savior. Praise the Lord!

Our marriage did not get better after that, partly because we are both attending different church services and cell group meetings. We were like 2 single married couples who live our life individually. As Christians, we are not supposed to go for divorce as marriage is a convenent, but deep in my heart, i struggled because i felt that Andy is not the husband that i wanted. My thinking over the years has been changing so much, and i strongly felt that Andy was not the one for me, and it is better to end our marriage earlier to continue suffered with each other. But, everytime, when i prayed, God always gave me the same word, "Today, if you hear my voice, do not hardened yr heart". May times, i wanted to give up as i felt it is really unbearable to continue the relationship.

In Sep 2004, God let both of us baptised on the same day, and because of God's calling, i decided to go for my water baptism. At that time, i did not know the purpose behind, but i understood that this is God's plan for me to restore my marriage. From the water baptism, i got to know his cell group friends, and i felt that his cell group friends have a better relationship with him than me. This is a big blow for me but it also served as a red alert for me.

I continued to seek God for an answer but i guessed the timing was not right yet, thus, God did not reveal His plans to me. However, I saw God's love to me through Andy when he gave me a valentine's present, but i threw it on the floor, and the word "Love' on the gift was cracked. Andy did not say a word, but picked it up to patch up the cracked wordings. i saw God's grace through him and decided to change.

We tried very hard to keep up our relationship, and i even changed to Chinese church service and cell group meetings in order to draw closer to him. However, as a human being, i still have negative thoughts in times that he is not the perfect one for me. Generally, our education background and thinking are very different. i'm a person who plans a lot and think a lot, but he is the easy go lucky guy, and his thoughts are very naive and simple. still struggled till a point recently that i told him straight on the face that if not for God, i would definitely divorced him. He wept that night.

The next day, while i was watching the sermon online on the topic, " the power of brokenness", i felt that God spoke direct to my heart that i'm a person with the hard shell, full of pride, proud, self-centred, not easy to get along. It's not easy to swallow the comments from God, and i cried the whole night. I always thought myself as an understanding person, a kind person.

The next morning, i apologised to Andy about what God commented about me, and how God told me the good points of him, we wept together so hard and so loud that i felt that my hard shell was being broken... i know that it's not complete yet, but i thank God for the initial hard shell to be broken, which i believe God will take away the whole hard shell that i've got, and touch me completely.

now, i understand this verse, "the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom". All the while, i desired God to speak to my heart, because i know that for a proud person like me, i only listen to what He says, and convinced by what He said. Thus, when He commented, i break down completely because i always have the fear of the Lord.

I pray that God will continue to change me to a better person, be a God's person, and to be a true disciple of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Today is a very tiring day, seems can't do much work at all. I'm struggled with some affairs in my heart. I still could not get over certain issues, and it's like no one can help. In my heart, i feel that my relationship with Andy is getting very weird. I always feel that we are getting very distant, and i don't really want to talk to him much as i feel that we can't communicate well. Our thoughts are very different, and i find that our characters are also very different. I feel that he has stopped to progress since years back, and i've been learning and progressing over the years, thus, i face difficulties communicating with him.
I always tell him to upgrade himself, and to read and pray, but he seems not very spiritual nowadays. Perhaps i seldom encourage him as i'm also busy with my job and my business. I've seek help from my cell group leader, but he seems to be so busy to sit down together to talk to us. I've given up any hope on that, but i will seek God to help me. Now, i've to think of his good points to keep me going, but inside my heart, i still yearns for God to send someone to interfere.

Happiness is Living in the Now

"This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." - Psalm 118:24

Many people think that happiness can either be the past or in the future, but in fact, it is the present! It's about putting our focus on the right place, and we can have countless reasons to rejoice because it is God who has made this day, and everything on earth is created by our Father in Heaven. Instead of counting our blessings, we are always worry about our tomorrow. Thus, we must change our mindset to give thanks, and when we recall of things that happened yesterday when a new day begin, we feel so blessed that God is with us through all things.
(and, this reminds me of a verse "He shall never leave nor forsake us")

I have been so tensed up during the past weeks of the changes in my life and workplace that i could not slept peacefully at night. For friends who known me, i'm always a person who is sound asleep that no matter what happen, it will never wake me up till dawn comes. But, these few weeks, i only slept for 3 - 4 hours a day, and it is not sound alseep. I prayed to God to let me sleep well, think of all that i can to sleep well, but it doesn't seem to work at all. While doing my QT, i realised that my mind has not submitted to God for certain issues, and last night, i told God that i'm going to have a good sleep despite all the worries that i'm going through. I trust for His guidance and presence with me throughout all things, and PTL, i slept soundly from 12 midnight till 6am last night. Hallelujah!

Happiness is finding wisdom and understanding

"Happy is the person who finds wisdom and gains understanding" - Proverbs 3:13 NLT
Happiness is what most people seek, and to be what you want to be is always a choice. i always believe the choice that we made will decide what we can become.Everyday, i wake up, i thank God for a new day that light shines, and i live another day. Thus, i like to bring a smile to prepare myself for work.
Through the demand of our daily life, and pressures of everyday living, life seems to be out of balance, and we lose our perspective. Thus, we need to seek the world through His eyes, and seek God for wisdom to lead and direct us. Read His words to receive the fresh perspective.